Trapped on Earth

Source: XKCD

Sometimes I wonder if in a few million years some advanced alien race will show up at Earth. They had long ago filtered out all of the radio noise in the galaxy, narrowed down the planets likely to hold life, and finally set out to explore the galaxy.
As they neared our star system they would do some scans and find that the third planet from the sun had a good atmosphere, a warm climate that could support liquid water, and even - to their joy - it was surrounded by thousands of tiny bits of metal; manmade satellites.

They would try to hail us, but would receive no reply. They would come closer to our planet and notice a few man-made objects on Mars. Their stomachs [or whatever they have] would twist with excitement at their realization that we too had the power to leave our planet and travel in space.

They would reach earth and scan it. They would only find primitive cities, barbaric savages, and derelict automated machines trying desperately to fulfill their futile mission. These humanoid barbaric savages couldn't be the ones who built the satellites and the man-made objects on mars could they? Something must have happened to them. Who was that once proud race that once beamed messages into space and sent robots all throughout their star system?

I wonder if the human race will really amount to anything other than a fascinating line of rubble in the fossil record. We refuse to seek out alternative sources of energy, we are so territorial that we kill our own species, and people are even suggesting we should abandon sending people into space altogether.

We are overcrowding this planet, we're killing much of the life on it, and no one seems to be getting it through their thick skull that this is the only planet that we have. That's it. We fuck it up and we're dead. There is no escape hatch, no reset switch, no backup planet we can jump to.

We have to work hard to leave this planet and colonize other worlds. We should be treating other planets the way we treat other continents: take it over and breed like mad.

The Whopper Virgins and Foreign Food

Burger King recently did an experiment where they had people try a Big Mac and a Whopper who had never had or seen a hamburger before. After the experiment they sent crews to extreme regions and gave them the opportunity to try a hamburger for the first time.

You can watch their propaganda-documentary here.

My favorite part is when a girl bites into a hamburger and acts surprised when she tastes a pickle. It's sponsored by Burger King but the experiment was real and the responses to a hamburger are interesting.

I remember the first time I tried a pickled and fermented egg... it was revolting but it was a taste I didn't know I could taste. I love trying new foods and I'm a little envious that in the distant future my distant grandchildren may be feasting on totally alien foods.

How could you describe the taste of an unearthly plant that is neither fruit nor vegetable? What if the plant itself is an herbivorous plant that feasts on other plants that grow around it? What about eating the meat of an animal that doesn't have flesh or muscles as we know of? What about unknown spices?

Spoiled grandchildren...

Alone on Earth?

My friend Novah, from Visualizing Evolution linked to my blog so I guess it's time to start updating more frequently.

Whenever there is something in the news about intelligent life on other planets, there is usually the comment of not being 'alone'.

Can we even really consider ourselves alone? We're on a planet that is literally teeming with life all over the surface and even under it. We can't really say we're alone because there are other life forms all around us. There are billions of living creatures on this planet and the notion of having a pet animal is universal.

But that's not quite the same. What we usually mean by alone, we usually mean in the form of companionship. We overlook the other living creatures on our planet, we are looking for other intelligent creatures that we can hold a conversation with. In a dark universe we are looking for a mate.
But maybe we are just ignorant. Maybe intelligent beings walk among us that aren't human.
I don't mean aliens.

There seems to be more and more evidence arising that we aren't the only sentient intelligent creatures on earth.

For example; dolphins have their own names. Here is an article with several examples of dolphin intelligence. In the article there are stories of a dolphin that tricks its human trainers into giving it more fish, dolphins using tools and other signs of their self awareness. Dolphins even seem to commit crimes.
But we've all heard the dolphin argument before right?

Don't get me started on Bonobos, my favorite primate. They're known to have highly developed lingual skills [for a chimp], and they're known to be extreme sexual deviants. Bonobos even share most of their DNA with us.

Just look at a few pictures of Bonobos and you'll realize how eerily human-like they are. They walk up-right a quarter of the time, the females have large breasts [most apes are flat chested], and they even have pink lips. Give them a few million years and some enlightenment and maybe some day we could see human and bonobo descendants getting married.

I hope my descendants find a good woman like Ari.

I'm sure you've heard those examples before though. "Sure, sure," you say, "Dolphins could be intelligent, and maybe even apes, but other than that we're alone... right?"

There is more research amounting that suggests Elephants may be as, or more intelligent than dolphins. Here's a summary thanks to Wikipedia, though it doesn't end there.

I don't think we're alone, I think we're just ignoring the other intelligent species around us. If humans don't kill off all of the intelligent species [Bonobos and Elephants are both endangered], maybe we should just leave the planet and let evolution take care of things.

Perhaps millions of years in the future after mankind has seeded the galaxy they will seek out their planet of birth. Homo Excelsior lands in the heart of Africa hoping to come face to face with their ancestors.
Instead they are greeted by something similar to humans...
An evolved Bonobo chimp offers them a tribal sacrifice while nearby, an elder of the elephants bows down to offer peace on behalf of the Elephant Empire.

Hell yeah.